New Year’s Resolutions for Inconsiderate People

The new year is typically a time when people make resolutions.   Here is a list of my resolutions, not for me, but for those among us who never learned about showing consideration for others.

As a teacher, I have a front row seat to bad manners.  Students regularly yawn uttering a large roar, never covering their mouths.  I’ve lost track of how often a student walks in the middle of two people having a conversation without saying, “Excuse me.”

When teens talk to one another in person, they should remove all ear buds; otherwise, it looks like the person is not giving his full attention to the speaker.

I wish people would resurrect the saying “you’re welcome” instead of “no problem” when someone says “thank you.”  “No problem” gives the wrong impression that whatever act was performed was a difficulty—not a pleasure.

Sometimes I feel I must be the last man on earth who feels that swearing in public is not okay especially when children are present.

I still recall a family vacation a decade ago when my wife and two young boys were strolling the streets of Golden, Colorado past a group of men sitting at an outside table, their discussion peppered with vulgarities.  As we passed, one of them said, “Pardon us.”  The reason this has remained in my memory is because it is the only time I have ever heard such an apology coming from another human being.

After unloading groceries, return the shopping cart to the proper corral; the parking lots have several.  Think about the next driver who won’t be able to park in the space without hitting the cart left behind. Is it that much effort to walk it back?

Try not going to See’s Candies for a free sample without any intention of buying anything.  Too many selfish people take advantage of a kind gesture.

During the holidays, I saw an elderly man get free candy for himself, his wife, and granddaughter.  Then when his granddaughter said she did not like chocolate, he went ahead and asked the employee for another choice of candy.  Loyal customers end up footing the bill for these freeloaders.  Plus, what lesson is the grandfather teaching?

At the gym, wipe down the machines after using them.  Most members don’t even wipe them before using them.  I’m stunned watching people put their bare hands on equipment not knowing whose hands were previously there and what bacteria was on those hands.

Enough with people taking their dogs everywhere they go.  Latest crazy sighting?  At a Starbucks.  No, not at an outside patio, but inside . . . with the cocker spaniel sitting on a stool.

People in recent years have been sensitive about nut allergies which affect about 7% of the population, yet allergies to dogs and cats are nearly doubled that at 15%.  So why aren’t more merchants and customers complaining about the dogs?

I wish bicyclists would at least slow down at stop signs. Why someone riding a bike feels emboldened to run through stop signs at the risk of being hit by a 2-ton motor vehicle is beyond me.  Too often people count on the consideration of other people without exhibiting that behavior themselves.

People think nothing of using their hands to text or talk using a cell phone while driving, yet for some reason using their turn signal requires too much effort for their fellow drivers.  With everything automatic in cars these days, surely car companies can program signals to automatically go on as soon as the driver turns the steering wheel a specified number of degrees.

Funny how drivers blow through stop signs and red lights, but delay going on green lights due to using their cell phones.

For 2019, let us keep in mind that we live in communities.  Showing consideration for others makes us all safer . . . and nicer.

Old Grades, New Parades

One benefit of having winter break in the middle of the school year is that it provides an opportunity for fresh starts.   And those of us who work at Hoover High School sure could use a cleansing of last semester’s turmoil that slammed our campus like a tornado:  the student brawl, the walkout, the negative press.  A feeling of unfinished business hung over us like a fog for a good part of the fall.

With this in mind, I began the first day back by passing out neon red squares of paper to my students and having them write last semester’s grades along with a short reflection.  I told them this would not be shared with anyone including me.

Once students finished, I had them fold the paper in half twice into tiny squares.

“We are locking away the past forever and . . .” I said, as trash cans were distributed down each row, “. . . throwing the grades and any negative feelings out.  Not the lessons learned just the grade itself.  It’s a new year and a new semester, time for a new beginning.”

I dimmed the lights.

“First, let’s get reacquainted with Room 11202.  Did you miss this room during the break?  It’s been a while, so in your new seat, place your hands in front of you on the table to have a physical connection to the environment, close your eyes, and think positive thoughts.  In order to give you ideas on what to think about, I will share mine.”

“Dear Room 11202.  Thank you for being here for my students and I.  For being a sanctuary of learning.  We look forward to wonderful memories the rest of the way.”

“Now I’m going to ask you to close your eyes for at least one minute.  You may begin.”

I played meditative music at low volume.

Once most students’ eyes had opened, I passed out pastel blue squares of paper.

“Write down a favorite memory you have from winter break that brought you joy.  It could be a gift, a song, a text, a sunset.  Write down what the memory is and why it brought joy to you.”

“Fold it once and put it inside a safe place in your binder.  Now you have something that makes you feel good each and every day.  Some of the approaching days will be pleasant ones, but some will not.  For that darkest day that may surface, when it seems everything has gone wrong, open up your binder and look at this piece of paper and be reminded of what gives you joy.”

By happenstance, principal Jennifer Earl walked into my classroom right at the time I was beginning this lesson.  Usually she stays for a few minutes then continues on to other rooms in making her rounds.

This time I asked her to stay for the entire lesson because I wanted her to experience this for herself.  She even threw away her own red piece of paper with great enthusiasm.

Well, she was so inspired by what she saw, she asked me to do the lesson with the entire staff at that afternoon’s faculty meeting.

When I demonstrated the activity with my peers, I sensed a calmness in the room.  Reconnecting with our workplace felt like the right thing to do coming back after the break.  We all needed closure. How serendipitous that Dr. Earl walked into my room when she did as if it was meant to be.

And all of this happened in just the first day.  I can’t wait to see what will unfold the rest of the year.